Time #1 was in the book we're reading for my Summer Book Club, One Thousand Gifts by Ann VosKamp. I think I've always looked at this name of God's in a "fill in the blank" kind of name. For example, "I AM the Living Water", or "I AM the Bread of Life", and one of my favorites, "I AM the Alpha and the Omega, the beginning and the end". Jesus is all of this and more, but I believe He is teaching me something very specific about Himself through His name, I AM.
Listen to how I heard His name through the book. Ann says, "Full attention fills the empty ache. This. Is this eucharisteo the way to that elusive fullest life, the one that lives in the moment?" She then quotes Elizabeth Elliot saying, "Wherever you are, be all there." (From Through Gates of Splendor (Carol Stream, Ill.: Tyndale House, 1986, 20.) Ann continues, "This is where God is. In the present. I AM-His very name. I want to take shoes off. I AM, so full of the weight of the present, that time's river slows to a still...and God Himself is timeless." (page 69)
Time #2: He intentionally touched my soul with His name at the She Speaks Conference in the Prayer Room. The She Speaks team had taken each of our names and prayed over us- 650 women. Each name typed and cut out on a small strip of paper. They prayed a specific name of God over each one of us that the Holy Spirit had led them to pray.
As I entered the Prayer Room on Saturday, I was anxious to see which name of God had been prayed over me. With each of God's names printed on a separate sheet of paper, displayed on two tables, with all of the women's names taped around the one prayed over us, I quickly scanned through them looking for mine. On the first table, several God names down, I found my name. The name of God that had been prayed over me was the name, "Jehovah- I AM"! I almost couldn't believe my eyes. Out of all of the names of God dispersed through the room, "I AM" was prayed over me.
"I AM," The One Who is The Self-Existent One
God never changes. His promises never fail. When we are faithless, He is faithful. We need to obey Him.
Ex. 3:14, 6:2-4, 34:5-7; Ps. 102
God already had my attention, but now He was turning up the volume. After the second shout out from the Lord, I continued to dwell on His name.
Over the next week, as I was thinking about all I had learned at the conference and the direction I felt like the Holy Spirit was leading me in, "I AM" continued to seep deeper into my soul.
Time #3: "The third time is a charm." It was Sunday morning, the week after the conference, and our pastor was continuing his sermon series on "Jesus Is..." from the book of John. The passage for the day was John 8:12-30 where Jesus proclaims, "I am the Light of the World."
Pastor Eddie had gotten to his third point where Jesus is explaining to the Jewish leaders that they cannot go where He is going and that they will die in their sins. (John 8:21-24 NIV) Jesus was explaining that when they lift Him up on the cross, they will be exalting the One they claim they know- I AM. But they don't recognize Him. The great I AM is standing and teaching right where they are. In the present, in the moment- thus His name, "I AM". He is standing right before their eyes and they don't see Him.
Haven't I been just like the Pharisees? Hasn't Jesus, "I AM", been right in front of me and I've missed Him time after time? Yes, I have. "God, please forgive me for missing You, existing in the present, here... now." There have been many times that He is showing me His glory and I've missed it, because I am distracted and I am not here, in the now, in the present with "I AM". But in those moments where I have been present with Him, I have seen His glory. I have radiated the glow of His presence in my life. And you know what....I'm not missing Him this time.
I see You! I see Your glory! I know You are shouting Your name before me, and this is what I'm hearing You say to me...
"I AM right here, in the moment, in the present with you. This is where I exist. I'm never late or early because I AM. Remember My promise to you in My Word where I said, " You will seek Me and find Me when you seek Me with all your heart" ? (Jeremiah 29:13) I keep My promises!
Don't let the busyness and the distractions of life keep you from finding Me.
In every moment that I've ordained for you, I AM!
Lord Jesus, I AM, help me to not miss any more moments. I want to exist with You and not always searching for You. Help me to worship and enjoy Your presence, in the present. Thank You for capturing not just my attention, but my heart. I love You, Amen!